Please read my article on Enneagram Type Ones if you are unfamiliar with that Enneagram personality types. The following are brief sketches of real Ones that I have known personally..their names have been changed, but we can use their life stories to better understand the Type Ones and ourselves. Note the One patterns and motivations. If you are a Type One perhaps you can use these people’s stories to better understand yourself.
Barbara- Latin female early 30′s from a Latin American country who came to the U.S. when she was a girl. Divorced from a common law marriage. Two kids. Animal lover. Strict vegan (vegetarian). Very thin. Holistic remedies- anti-medicine, anti-toothpaste, anti-deodorant. Eco-friendly: conserves energy, 100% green, won’t flush toilet if just urine. Raised from strict Catholic upbringing, dabbled between atheism and Jesus, but maintained her moral belief code.
Victim of spousal abuse (physical and mental). Self-esteem zero. Very fearful. Drama queen. Bi-sexual, and feels more comfortable being a lesbian. Relationships with men have been HOT and COLD and co-dependent. Longs for male romance but pushes away. Financial: poor, always needs roommates. Work: steady- works for local government (health field) and knows all the free programs to help her. Doesn’t like being judged by her parents, but freely judges others. Enjoys asking personal questions to total strangers, and is probably too trusting. Dark humor. Bites nails. Wants sympathy for being a martyr. Possibly manic-depressive.
Low creative output, but very active and book-learned. Will refuse to lose a debate, and will argue non-stop, to the point of labeling others and not speaking to them. Big time critic.
Paula: White female in her 80′s. A widow with a grown son and grandchildren. She had lost another son when he was young. Very strict diet to the point of being too limiting: she says she can’t eat bananas, bread, and other regular and generally nutritious items; her doctors agreed with her and put her on this diet. She is sickly thin. Very traditional with her Jewish upbringing- observes the holidays, but does not go to temple. No drugs, no cheating, law abiding, 100% straight-laced.
Was divorced back in the day because her husband was a traveling gambler. Survived the Great Depression, but was indoctrinated to save money. All of her friends can’t believe how frugal she is. She and her husband had amassed tens of thousands (if not more) of dollars, but she refused to spend it, and refused to buy “luxury” items, such as new glasses or a better hearing aid for her late husband or new clothes. She’s been known to haggle with coupons, and will divide tip and tax if eating out with members of his volunteer organization. A martyr but wants no sympathy.
Criticizes friends, second-guesses their decisions, and applies her Spock-like unemotional logic to her friends that would rather be supported emotionally. Gets along with younger people she trusts. Clean freak and afraid of germs- very uncomfortable to sit down on her couch if you are a visitor. Mets fan since Day One. Financial: Filthy rich but won’t spend a dime. Work: Retired teacher, worked her entire life. Possibly obsessive compulsive.
Jon (with 9 wing): Latin male in his early 50′s who was raised in a Latin American country and came here as a boy. Divorced and re-married. One child under new marriage, and one step-child. Loved them to death. Came from a very strict upbringing, and complied with obeying authority with no questions asked. No drugs, no crimes. His appearance and macho behavior betray a lack of confidence on the inside when it comes to the English language and having enough knowledge or skills when it comes to certain things.
100% active in sports and athletics. Can beat people half his age. Opened his heart to Jesus thanks to his new wife when he was around 40+. His spiritual side is always there and he is like a pastor, but he is able to turn off his emotions at work or with personal relationships. Known be a real hardass. Very frugal, but winds up spending a bunch of money but has no choice since he lives with a big family, with mostly females. No choice.
Master of words of wisdom, proper procedures, logic, the right way, and cliches, but sometimes becomes hypocritical and frustrated when he can’t apply them in real life. Generally does not lose his temper and is extremely patient. Realizes that he is not perfect and tries to grow, although he doesn’t tell people this. Actually very self-aware, but only expresses his self-critiques, doubts, and fears to his wife.
Old school belief systems and has high standards, and a clear view of right vs wrong. Finance: Upper middle-class but with tons of debt and expenses with such a large family. Work: Extremely stable production manager in California. It could be argued he’s a workaholic. Does not miss work unless extremely ill or his wife wants to go on vacation.
Abused and killed animals as a kid, sees animals as being made for man with no souls. Sensitive to criticism and is highly competitive, but won’t admit it to anyone; he loves to dish out criticism as well. Bites his nails, and is very self-conscious, if not vain. Hates dirt and filth.
Always strives for the ideal and perfection, and never gives up. Sometimes falls into standard human temptations and negative emotions, in which he uses the Bible to get the answers he needs to become a better person. One of the most healthy Ones I had the privileged of knowing.
Cynthia: White female in her 60′s. Born in the mid-west from a strict family who forced her to go to church, she embraced it and has followed all the religious rules to this day. Obeys and respects all authority, and doesn’t approve of expressions of individuality (such as athletes making so much money). Married and loyal. Gives to charity, community service, and goes above-and-beyond when it comes to helping those in need. Very trusting, if not naive. Weird sense of humor. Top notch human being, and great hostess.
Very thin but enjoys cooking recipes. Adopted a child when she was younger, but the kid rebelled against her and her husband, and she was unable to reform him- even after dozens of chances he continued to break the law and rebel against all authority and use people for his selfish needs.
Clean freak- possibly obsessive compulsive, especially with correcting spelling and grammar. Very active and friendly. Financial: Lower upper middle class. Work: Retired teacher.
Nancy- White female in her early 50′s. Was adopted by a rich family, and enjoyed being an American Princess. Very into the material world. Loves photography and art. A post-modern college graduate. There’s no spiritual bone in her body- everything is about money, money, money. Known to hurl cutting insults at people, without realizing or caring…or apologizing. Very outspoken and critical. Highly competitive with her sister and anyone else in her tax bracket or higher. Legalistic. On the other side of the coin, she can be very personable and caring, and is a hard worker and fantastic hostess. Finance: Upper class, always was dependent on super rich parents. Puts pressure on her husband to generate high income. Work: School teacher.
Married with one child, who is spoiled just like she was/is. Loves to cook and eventually gained weight as she aged, due to stress (father sick, marriage, child, health). Very patient and puts up with a lot of crap from her husband and kid.
Sameer- Male in his 30′s. Born in India, raised in New Jersey. Very competitive, nerdy, geeky, and with a black humor. Very reliable and consistent. Later became a workaholic in an engineering business. Extremely productive. Stays active and busy, and has side-hobbies. Generally shy and reserved, but opinionated if you ask him something. Can be sarcastic. Married his first “girlfriend”, who was the opposite of him. Was it love or lust? We may never know for sure, since it’s a taboo topic and he’s not very expressive to acquaintances. Has a child, whom he loves. Has a system of morality that has steered him free from crime, and can rationalize things to fit his world view. Has a very small circle of friends, as his life revolves around work and his kid. Falls a sleep a lot. Financial: Solid and stable middle class, although like many of the Ones in this case study, it’s never enough. Work: His life.
Valeria: Deceased female who immigrated from Europe to the U.S. when she was a teenager. Married young, was 100% loyal, drug free, crime-free, and was never educated. She was a strict parent, and obeyed her husband. Enjoyed being a house-wife but worked in a factory when needed during the Depression and whenever her husband asked her to. Protective of her family, but did not express love in a motherly way, and was known to be frugal, highly offensive, and outspoken. Not friendly, but loved to socialize. Liked community center and staying busy. Afraid of animals. Highly superstitious- almost like a gypsy. Loved to cook and was thin. Extremely active, always walked miles every day. Finance: Poverty level, did not like to spend money she had, and made due with what she had. Work: Domestic.
Melissa (with 2 wing): Female in her 20′s, born and raised in Long Island, with parents that were Jewish and Christian. Parents were both in 2nd marriages, and there was a lot of Jerry Springer drama going on as a kid. Used to quote the Bible, and judged others but she was a party girl- sex, drugs, and techno music- all staring as a teenager. Really came off as two-faced, and she was- literally; all of her life she had 1 vs 2 conflicts- logic vs emotion; rules vs feelings.
Had an abusive boyfriend who sold cocaine. She was not educated, self-critical, had zero self-esteem, but attacked others to build herself up. Dressed like a slut for attention and knew how to manipulate base men. Tried to reform bad boys and pull good boys down. Never married but had long engagements (during which she would cheat, but deny it to everyone except her party girlfriends). Did not get along with other women- cat fight. Tattle-tail, liar, thief, backstabber, jealous, scheming, flirtatious. Hated “getting caught”. Tried to be a “good person” on the surface, but was riddled with bad karma. Enjoyed being independent but always wound up asking Daddy for money. Unable to take care of a pet. Actually matured as she got older, calmed down a bit, forgave some of her “sins”, tried to move forward, and heal broken friendships. She gained a ton of weight. Financial: Lower class, but her father has cash. Work: Odd jobs, limited by poor educational background and social issues.
Other DailySkew Enneagram links:
Enneagram: Who’s What?
Enneagram quotes parody
Animalgram and personality rewiring