Carpal Tunnel Syndrome
The carpal tunnel is located at the underside of your wrist and the base of your palm. There are nine flexor tendons that flex your fingers. Each of these tendons is protected by a sheath that allows the tendons to glide easy when you move your fingers and thumb. There is also a nerve called the median nerve, which sends messages to the hand.
Repetitive hand and finger movement (many times causes by using the computer keyboard) causes the tendon sheaths to become irritated and swollen. This pinches or compresses the median nerve, which leads to Carpal Tunnel Syndrome (CTS)- pain and a cut-off blood supply.
Here is a brief list of common causes of CTS: typing, writing, mousing, assembly line work, operating a cash register or similar machine, and pregnancy.
Are there any treatments that allow
carpal tunnel relief?
Yes, IMAK offers a complete line of carpal tunnel syndrome pain relief products, including the IMAK SmartGlove, which is guaranteed to provide
carpal tunnel relief from CTS pain and discomfort.
Key benefits of the SmartGlove include an increase of comfort and circulation, ensures correct wrist position, the cushioning and protection of the underside of your wrist, and it is reversible to fit your left or right hand.
Labels: health
Help cure and treat Alzheimer's Disease
By now it's very possible you have lost or known someone suffering from Alzheimer's Disease. Just this year, an old family friend of mine named Bernie passed on. My close friend Gary's dad passed away this year, too. My partner at work Danny lost his father, who suffered from this horrible disease, too. It is a tragic and slow disease that shatters the memories of the vibrant people.
That's why I'd like to let everyone know about the
Alzheimer's Memory Walk, which raises awareness and funds for Alzheimer care, support, and research. I'm sure you've seen these 2-3 mile walks. Well, every community is looking for team captains and volunteers. It's pretty simple- yet important- and is held on a weekend morning this fall.
You can search for the closest chapter near you by following the links in this post. You can register online, get your own website, and invite others to join your team.
Labels: buzz, health
Canadian Medical ID Jewellery
Universal
Medical ID offers bracelets, necklaces, watches and sport bands in a wide variety of styles and makes, such as gold, gold-filled, sterling silver, stainless steel, titanium, and nylon medical ID jewellery.
Why are medical identification accessories important? Because in the time of an emergency, many patients cannot speak for themselves, and correct diagnosis in the first few minutes is critical.
Labels: buzz, health
Diet Pill Scams?
Finally, thanks to ConsumerPriceWatch.net, anyone who is trying to avoid getting scammed can find out the
10 best diet pills. This website has taken all the guesswork out of it by rating the major diet pills with the following criterion: Value, Ingredient Quality, Customer Feedback, Safety,Company Reputation, Reorder Rates, Customer Service, Product Sensation, Packaging, Long-Term Benefits, Product Convenience, and Weight-Loss Potential.
Did you ever hear of the weight loss pill called 7-DFBX? Have you ever wondered if it really is possible to Lose 17 pounds in 7 days? Well, ConsumerPriceWatch.net found that taking 7-DFBX along with a Smart Carb diet that it did happen. 7-DFBX contains a blend of Natural Detoxifying ingredients that promote weight loss by flushing toxins out from our bodies.
I definitely recommend that you check out their site so you can see the reviews yourself. In addition to ranking the Top Ten best diets pills they searched the Internet for the lowest price diet pills.
Labels: health, Review
India Earthquake, No Ice in North Pole, Al Gore Global Warming
Al Gore: For the first time in human history, there will be NO ice in the North Pole. Just let that sink in a little bit. Right now, reports are coming in that a 6.7 Indian earthquake has been registered. There is no word on the amount of damage of human casualities, but if China's earthquake is any indication, it will be tragic.
And this comes full circle back to what I have been saying for so long- global warming is real. Global warming, which is caused by big business and irresponsible politicians, is destroying our planet. And we need to stop it.
And now, I will retreat back into my cave of obscurity, whilst the geniuses continue to ignore my seemingly
prophetic words and suggestions.
Labels: health, mock, news, parody, society
Bees in neighbor's backyard
I was walking my dog after I got home from work and saw that a bunch of
bees made a hive on my Columbian neighbors' lawn chair. My first instinct was to protect my dog from the bee stings, so I walked the other way. I was staring at the bees for so long, like a car wreck.
After my dog did her business, I went home and got my wife to take a look, and to take these copyrighted photos.
I saw the parking lot, both of my neighbors cars were not there, just their motorcyle was parked. No one was outside, so I don't know if anyone was home or not.
My wife suggested that we knock or leave a note, but we didn't.
I even joked that it would be funny if one of them sat on the lawn chair tonight.
So..why am I anti-social? Why did I not tell the neighbors about the bees right behind their house?
Is it because they are immigrants that have 7 people, 2 dogs, and 2 babies living in one house?
Is it because I'm shy?
Is it because the bees aren't in
my backyard?
Is it because I don't want the bees to be disturbed because they may fly inside
my home?
Is it because they shouldn't have left their lawn chair out? After all I live in a townhouse community; none of us own the land and we shouldn't leave junk on it.
Is it because their little dogs bark at my dog?
Is it because I want to hear them scream when they sit on that chair tonight?
Is it because I don't want them to spray water on the bees and kill them?
Or is it because because they ALMOST KILLED MY DOG AND I BY LEAVING THAT STUPID CHAIR OUTSIDE, which is now a FREAKIN' BEE HIVE? My dog and I would have gotten STUNG TO DEATH if I wasn't so observant. SO...SCREW THEM. I HOPE THEY HAVE A BARBECUE TONIGHT.
Labels: florida, health, LME, rant
Dr. Hoffman Interview: Dry Drowning
Is your pool a death trap for your children?
DAILYSKEW: Dr. Hoffman, with the recent tragedy of a 10-year old child who drowned near Charleston, South Carolina last weekend, hours after he left his neighborhood swimming pool, many people are talking about DRY DROWNING. What is this and how long as this been going on?
DR. RICHARD HOFFMAN: Actually, this is not a new phenomena by any means. This has existed since man swam in the seas.
DS: I see...
RH: Yes, the so-called
"dry drowning" occurs when too much water goes into the lungs. Say, you breathe in water through the nose in a swimming pool. You cough it out, and you didn't drown, but you may still an hour later. Very sad.
DS: Wow! What can one do to prevent this?
RH: Get to the emergency room ASAP.
DS: I doubt they'd take me, though. I'd probably be sitting there for 3 hours and die on the spot.
RH: If the victim is complaining of difficulty breathing as you're going home, being sleepy...those are the symptoms of a near-drowning. That patient needs to be taken right to the hospital. That person needs to be monitored and may need to be put on a ventilator in case their breathing gets worse. Initial drowning event damages the lungs and then, in response, the lungs fill up with fluid and that's what event can kill you if you don't get medical attention.
DS: Uh-huh..I’ve never known a child could walk around, talk, speak and their lungs be filled with water. That's amazing.
RH: I treated a patient before who was the victim of a near-drowning, and initially checked out okay. Yet, two hours later, still at the hospital, her condition drastically dropped. Without the medical treatment, she very well could have become a drowning victim, herself.
DS: Okay, thanks, Doc.
Labels: health, PSA
Emotional Eating Diet
At
www.ShrinkYourself.com you can learn how to lose weight by learning to control your emotional eating. You may have seen and heard about the strict and restrictive diets, but did you know that 95% percent of dieters who lose weight gain it all back?
99% of people break their diets because they are stressed, depressed, or bored.
The key to long lasting weight loss is focusing on the reasons why you eat. Shrink Yourself is an online weight loss program that focuses on the psychological causes of weight gain, helps you examine why you eat too much, and how you can change achieve long term weight loss.
Labels: buzz, health
Acne Skin Care
There is no doubt that everyone has embarrassing stories about acne, but it's just not for teenagers in high school anymore. My acne killed my self-esteem, and I ripped up my class photos. That's why I glad SkinHealthToday.com is around as an educational site about
Skin care, health, and self-image. The Skin Health TODAY radio show on WorldTalkRadio.com is a free streaming online audio discussion about the misconceptions and myths of skin and beauty. The weekly topic is currently about the #2 adult skin condition: acne. If you listen to this stream you can learn what causes it and what really works in fighting acne. SkinHealthToday.com is a fully interactive site, with an active blog which encourages you to submit your topics and points of discussion. Bookmark the site, subscribe to the email list found in the blog, and tune in live to the weekly radio show to keep being informed.
Labels: buzz, health
Prescription Eyeglasses for only $8
It's official:
Zenni Optical: Sells Rx Glasses $8 with case!That's right- you can get a complete prescription single vision pair of eyeglasses with anti-scratch coating, UV protection, case, and lens edge polishing for only $8.
The reason why it is so inexpensive is because there are no middle men involved. Zenni Optical sells these manufactured frames DIRECTLY to you.
Labels: health, Review
Weight loss programs
As I mentioned before, the key to any healthy diet or weight loss program starts with the right exercise for you. For example, if you begin an
exercise program too aggressively, odds are that you will give up entirely due to frustration. Another huge key is having a consistent frequency of about 20 minutes a day- some combination of aerobic (running, swimming, jogging, etc.) and anaerobic (yoga, weights, etc.) training.
Now, no one is going to argue or disagree that exercise is a necessary component of weight loss, but they will complain about setting the time to do it. If you are a morning person, you need to schedule your 20 minutes then, no fussing. Even if you are not a morning person, you will soon find that your metabolism will increase and you will have more energy for the rest of the day.
Weight-loss-diet-help.com has a lot of tips and articles about exercising and compares the
best weight loss programs for losing fat quickly that you see and hear about, such as Medifast, Nutrisystem, Weight Watchers, and others. It also lists discount coupons and promotions for these programs, so you can save when you join, like the 25% off
Weight Watchers Online coupon (which will expire on Jan 31, 2008.)
Labels: buzz, health
Relax with Human Touch Massage Chairs
You work all day, either sitting in the same position in front of a computer screen or standing and moving around. Either way, your back is strained and your muscles ache. The cost of seeing a chiropractor or paying for daily massages is a lot of money.
That's why I'm spreading the word about
Massage Chairs by Human Touch. These advanced robotic massage chairs actually replicate the proven techniques used by professional massage therapists and chiropractors.
Human Touch Massage Chairs are designed to give a full-body massage by following the contours of your spine, body, neck, and feet. These state of the art products have three-dimension movements which provide relief to your sore or tight muscles. The controls are very easy to use, and you can even customize your massage area, intensity, and pick the techniques.
Labels: buzz, health
Minimally Invasive Plastic Surgery
Drs. Miklos and Moore are recognized as international experts in
vaginal surgery. Every week new patients from all over the United States fly down to Atlanta to see these physicians. These patients know that Drs. Miklos and Moore have the best experience in laparoscopic vaginal reconstruction, are fellowship trained in urogynecology, and are pioneers in minimally invasive vagina and bladder surgery. Whether it be anterior or posterior repair, LAVH, TVT sling, hymen restoration, labial reduction, mini-sling, burch, or other procedures, you can be assured that you are in professional and caring hands. The physicians have compassion, intelligence, experience, and a state of the art facility that uses cutting edge technology and equipment.
Labels: health, Review
Spider Veins Treatment
If you are searching for
spider vein treatment in Phoenix, look no further than Southwest Vein & Laser Institute. Dr. Edward Murphy and their aesthetic specialists want to help you regain your self-confidence by removing varicose veins or by reducing cellulite. The latest technologies are used, and they are very effective.
Southwest Vein & Laser Institute has perfected methods for laser skin tightening, fractional skin resurfacing fine lines, wrinkle reduction, scars and acne scars, photofacials for the clearance of age spots, rosacea, spider veins and acne clearance, permanent hair reduction, microdermabrasion, Botox, collagen fillers, meso-lipo dissolve, and cellulite treatments.
There is no question that they are a fully accredited, advanced facility that provides the latest developments in treatment.
Labels: health, Review
Online Insurance Policy
There are certainly many different
insurance quoting services online, but I do know one site that makes comparing
insurance quotes easy: Advantage Term Life. They take the hassle out of you having to contact each and every major insurance company in the United States.
We all know that shopping for
family insurance can be a very time consuming and even stressful experience. You can fill out a quick simple online form with Advantage, and a customer service representative can clear up any confusion you may have about the various kinds of coverages.
Labels: buzz, health
USA-HealthInsurance
It's real easy and simple- if you are an individual or small business, you can get free quotes in 60 seconds for individual and small business health & dental insurance plans. Whether it is Blue Cross Blue Shield, United, Kaiser, Aetna, Assurant, Humana, Golden Rule, Unicare or more- agents are available for all states. COBRA replacement and individual health insurance policies are also available.
USA-HealthInsurance.com is a great broker for many states, offering group or individual health insurance coverage. You can compare quotes. They constantly look for the best plans and rates for
affordable health insurance in Kentucky, and other states. They have agents that specialize in specific states.
Labels: health, Review
DailySkew Health Watch PSA
Public Service AnnouncementAs the weekend is here, and most of the DailySkew's loyal readers had a tough and tiring week, I want to post a few reminders about maintaining your physical health, which in turn helps mental health as well.
Eat rightSo many people are always "on the go", that they can't eat a healthy breakfast or lunch. By the time dinner rolls along, you either eat too much, or your body is longing for a quick fix of fats or sugar. Many nutritionists even say that if you can't schedule 3 square meals to at least eat a little bit all day, staring with a banana, bowl of cereal and milk, and orange juice in the morning.
The same goes for drinking. The best drink in water. So if your office has a water fountain, get as many free refills as you can for your 8 hours of imprisonment. :-)
Stay away from juices or teas loaded with sugar. Get the real stuff, with no artificial flavoring and additions.
Soda is definitely a no-no.
You have to eat
fruits and vegetables daily. I mean, apples (especially the Fuji small ones) rule. So do grapes, small oranges, and so many other fruits that are easy to eat, taste like candy, and are inexpensive.
Many people hate vegetables, but carrots, spinach, asparagus, celery, and potatoes taste great to me.
Finally, so many of you get bombarded with "new studies" published in newspapers, or cable TV shows with chefs and "nutritionists" telling you to "watch carbs", "beware of fiber", "bread is bad", "pasta is bad", etc. Look, if you drink water and natural juices, stay away from junk foods, and have a varied daily diet, you will have the energy and mental outlook suitable for yourself.
And that leads me into the part of staying healthy that no diet can ever fix: exercise
Exercise
No, I don't mean going to the gym. I mean just start being mobile! It takes 10 minutes to stretch your body in the morning, around the same time it takes to take a dump. Try to touch your toes. Stretch your arms out. You can find different types of
exercises online now. Heck watch a youtube video or DVD of yoga, or
Tae Bo. You seriously don't have an excuse anymore not to stretch your body and make your muscles more flexible, and to actually do something physical!
You can do a lot of more physical things right at home, too. You can jog in place or lift a dumbbell, do push-ups and sit-ups, jumping jacks, just like gym class in high school. How about Dance Dance Revolution? The MEDIA wants you to believe you can only exercise by going to the park or going to a gym. But the truth is, you can get a good workout right in your home. You can do that for around 20 minutes a day for around 3-4 days a week, before you start to have more energy and feel better about yourself. Once you do get the energy and better mood, you will naturally increase the times, routine, and aggressiveness of working out.
Hygiene
Taking a shower everyday and brushing your teeth twice a day is recommended. Studies have shown that washing your hair everyday with shampoo is not recommended. Remember to floss once a day or every other day as well, depending on your needs. In terms of skin care, don't use soap on your face, get a cucumber based moisture or other type of cleanser to balance your skin's natural oils. Always remember to cut your nails, shave, and trim any unwanted hairs, unless you want to look like a cave person. ;-) Avoid reusing the same towel over and over again.
Final WordEveryone complains about being overweight, not having "time", or being lethargic, but no one does anything about it. So let's start doing something about it...TODAY.
Labels: health, PSA
Dry Shampoo helps the busy traveler
Salon Grafix Spray Powder ShampooWhen my wife and I were visiting Hong Kong and the Philippines last year, there were many different places to visit. Using modes of transportation that we were not used to, it took longer to get from one place to another.
By the time we got back to the hotel in Hong Kong, we were so tired we didn't really have the time or desire to take a long shower and wash our hair thoroughly. That was a situation where a spray on
shampoo would be handy, and would have helped immensely. A lot of people don't realize that Spray Powder Shampoo is just as, if not more, effective that the traditional shampoo.
When we were in the Philippines, the need for a
dry shampoo was extremely clear. To me, not having running hot water in the shower or sink is an emergency situation. My wife's hair is so long that standing in the shower under cold water was not comfortable at all. So keeping an extra bottle of Salon Grafix would have been a great plan.
There's no question that I'm going to get my wife Salon Grafix Dry Shampoo, especially with its color match formula (she has shiny black hair), which is perfect for cleansing her hair between normal shampoos or when we are on the go. This shampoo easily brushes off, and doesn't leave white powder or residue.
Labels: buzz, health, travel
Review: Peoples Health Insurance
Fully Trained and CertifiedUnlike other so-called insurance companies on the internet, Peoples Health Insurance, LLC is an actual licensed insurance agency, who answer your questions about the health insurance application process, policy benefits, plan pricing, and the different health provider networks of Florida and Illinois.
If you do not have any Health Insurance, or if you are not satisfied with your existing coverage, Peoples Health Insurance can find a wide range of benefit options and affordable plan premiums from HumanaOne, Blue Cross Blue Shield of Illinois, United Healthcare, Aetna, Assurant and Celtic. For example, if you are looking for
Illinois dental insurance, you can submit a very quick and simple rate quote online. You can choose from numerous health insurance carriers, and pick an affordable and flexible plan that fits your budget and lifestyle.
Labels: health, Review
Review: VirMedice EMR software
Electronic Health RecordsVirMedice is one of the leading
electronic health records software (EMR) consultants. They help physicians convert a paper records management format to an electronic health records keeping system.
VirMedice is affordable for small and mid-sized practices, and this health care management model allows you to use the best medical records management software available. In effect, VirMedice becomes your I.T. department, and even project management, training, implementation, and knowledge base development are included in this system. Unlike some other ASP (Application Service Providers), there are no hidden costs or surprise fees down the road with VirMedice.
EMR is a reality, and VirMedice leads the pack. With all of its included services. practices have many positive reasons to use this software.
Labels: health, Review
Online Pharmacy is safe, secure, and fast
Online Pharmacy is the wave of the futureWe truly live in a new and more convenient era of technology and medicine. Everyone who follows the medical industry knows that using an
online pharmacy is an innovation to the health care system that uses the Internet to improve patient access to the physician.
Now the patient no longer needs to wait and deal with a traditional physical exam. Now, the patient completes an online questionnaire, and it is then submitted to the physician, so you can get your prescription medication. Online Pharmacy will only refer your order to certified physicians that are fully licensed in the United States. Your privacy is assured, and your medication will be delivered via Next Day Fed-Ex.
Labels: health, Review
Review: Labia reduction surgery
Experts
Drs. John R. Miklos and Robert D. Moore are internationally known masters of Reconstructive Vaginal Surgery and Urogynecology. They stand by their claim that they've personally operated on patients in 46 United States and 25 countries.
They have been nationally recognized by major media outlets, such as Sirius Satellite Radio, The Maria Sanchez Show, Dr. 090210, The Toronto Sun Times, and more.
The Atlanta Vaginal Rejuvenation & Cosmetic Surgery Center is known for being the best in the field with its latest technological and surgical advancements.
There is no question that these doctors are professional, creative, and efficient, and use the latest proven methods for the following:
labia reduction surgery
labia major augmentation surgery
vaginal tightening surgery
hymen restoration
redundant prepuce removal
clitoral unhooding
revisions to botched surgeries
and more cosmetic procedures
Their compressive website has testimonials, where you can see mature before and after photos of surgery.
Labels: buzz, health, Review, technology
DailySkew Interview with Dr. Richard Hoffman, Part I
Phone Interview with Richard Hoffman
01-01-2008
DailySkew: Happy
New Year, Dr. Hoffman-
Dr. Hoffman: Oh, please call me Richard, you know me long enough.
DailySkew: All right, Richard. Thank you.
Dr. Hoffman: No problem.
DailySkew: Today, I'd like to speak with you about the cosmetic surgery, which gets a lot of buzz. In your professional opinion- yay or nay?
Dr. Hoffman: First of all, I'd like to define the term "self-image", because we hear that phrase tossed around a lot, don't we?
DailySkew: Yes, we do-
Dr. Hoffman: Well, it's a perception of how we believe we appear to others. So people who are happy with the way others see them, are much more likely to be self-confident, outgoing, and successful in work, social situations, dating, and- and just an overall high level of comfort in their relationships.
DailySkew: I see...
Dr. Hoffman: Yes, and those who are at the other end of the spectrum- those who are dissatisfied with their self-image tend to be awfully self-conscious, shy, inhibited, and less effective in these same types of situations.
DailySkew: Huh. So you're saying that if someone got breast implants or stapled her stomach, she can do better selling car insurance over the phone?
Dr. Hoffman: Actually, yes. Plastic surgery, which in itself is a general term anyway- let it be a cosmetic enhancement or reconstructive surgery- encourages and promotes a positive and strong self-image which translates into a major change on the personality. In fact, a small change on the outside transforms into an ever larger change on the inside of a person's subconscious psyche, which translates into climbing the healthy ladders of the Animalgram or Enneagram or Maslow's Pyramid.
DailySkew: Wow..it's hard for me to believe that, but-
Dr. Hoffman: Well, you don't have the field work, first of all. But I've seen numerous and numerous women- and even men- go through a small cosmetic or reconstructive procedure. And from what I've seen-without exception, mind you- is that these small changes greatly allow the self-confidence inside of a person to flourish. It truly is like a spiritual reawakening. You see, I truly believe that early on in our childhood, perhaps even at birth, that we create our own self-imprisonment. Many times, only with cosmetic surgery can we get back to the time in our lives when we truly felt confident and not self-conscious.
DailySkew: Whewwww....Okay, well, this is a lot to digest. Why don't you tell me how you fit in all of this?
Dr. Hoffman: Well, I pre-screen patients to make sure they are ready to undergo these procedures, so they can sign some forms for insurance purposes. I've been working with Dr-
DailySkew: Hold on, Richard- no name dropping please. I want everyone to be clear that this is not a sponsored advertisement.
Dr. Hoffman: Okay, okay, no problem.
DailySkew: Good.
Dr. Hoffman: Actually, it is a problem.
DailySkew: I'm sorry?
Dr. Hoffman: I thought you said that I can plug Dr-
DailySkew: NO!
Dr. Hoffman: Excuse me?
DailySkew: No, I'm sorry, this is an educational post ONLY.
Dr. Hoffman: Can I say it's out in California?
DailySkew: That's about it.
Dr. Hoffman: How about the e-mail?
DailySkew: I'm sorry, Richard, I have to go now...
Dr. Hoffman: What about my new book?
DailySkew: I'm sorry, I'll speak to you later. Thank you for you time.
Dr. Richard Hoffman is known for his work with the National Enneagram Council and founded the Animalgram Society. He has a PhD and Masters Degree from the University of Southern Fla. He was been a regular fictional contributor to the DailySkew.Labels: buzz, health, misunderstood, parody, society
Why it's hard for an American to maintain health...
"I'm fat, I'm fat, you know it!" 
You cannot argue that obesity and heart disease are major problems in the modern world. Sure, you can claim people have always been fat and always dying from heart attacks if you're being snarky. But the bottom line is that the United States has reached all-time high obesity levels.
Here are my observations as to why this epidemic is happening:
The United States and many other technologically advanced countries in the Western Hemisphere promote a
sedentary lifestyle, which means we truly are like
Homer Simpson. We take our cars everywhere instead of walking- because we think we "need" to go to a certain store. If we truly "need" to go to a certain store which is in walking distance, the majority of people still take the car because it's quicker. You see, people are always "busy". We are a remote control, cordless phone, stare at a flat screen for 4 hours a night,
make-money-while-sitting-in-front-of-the-computer-in-your-underwear society and we are proud of it. It's a shame humanity as devolved into sedentary corals. We sit all day in our offices, and then get too "tired" to exercise at home. It's against our genetic evolution!
You can have any diet you want, but the lack of exercise will make you susceptible to getting sick, injured, and obese. This lack of exercise is caused by laziness, the Western view that you have to be productive doing other things besides taking care of yourself, the technological advances that make things easier for us in the short-term, but not long-term, and the instant gratification and "control" of our "needs".
It doesn't help that the major supermarket chains sell food that is truly unhealthy, or that fast-food is poison to our systems. Their marketing campaigns and MEDIA influence plant in it on our heads that all the foods you see at the supermarket are okay for you. The "journalist" who lectures how bad McDonalds is for our health then buys a Big Mac.
For those of you who are "too busy" to take care of yourselves, stop reading this, and do some sit-ups right now. Heck, it only takes 5 minutes to try and touch your toes in the morning when you wake up. Start stretching exercises first, so you don't become this:
Labels: business, health, LME, MEDIA, news, society
Simon Delaghetto, Jr. Used Steroids...as a Kid!
News from the year 2030:
It's Official Delaghetto, Jr Used Steroids
Tampa Bay Rays MVP shortstop Simon Delaghetto, Jr. admitted that he did in fact use steroids, as revealed by the Brenner Report- as a kid.
When Junior was 5 years old, doctors prescribed steroids to help heal a rare pulmonary and skin disease. Simon was hospitalized for over a week due to his deteriorating condition.
"Yes, I used steroids," he said in a teary-eyed confession at a press conference.
"This will damage his reputation, that's for sure," said FOXNet commentator Mike Lupica, Jr. "Even though he admitted it- so what? Giambi and Pettitte admitted it years ago, and look what happened to them. Are we expected to believe Simon used it ONCE for some RARE and FATAL disease? Please..."
William Montgomery, spokesman for the Hall of Fame said, "I don't speak for the voters, but based on their lack of elections these past two decades, I'd say Simon Delaghetto, Jr. will be on the outside looking in when he retires."
Delaghetto has become the second youngest player in the history of baseball to hit 500 homeruns. The first was steroid user Alex Rodriguez, who is not in the Hall of Fame.
Labels: baseball, health, MEDIA, mock, parody, steroids
Get well, Simon
Dear Simon,
Perhaps years from now, you will be reading this with interest. I just came back from Joe DiMaggio Children's Hospital to see you. I gave you a black car that makes noises. You watched as Tony and I played Street Fighter II. I don't know how much you will remember from your time there, but I can vouch that it was a very traumatic experience for you. I do know that your parents supported you, cared for you, and loved you.
When I was six years old, I spent Christmas Eve in King County Hospital in New York. I had such a sharp pain in my stomach, and I went there in the middle of the night. The doctors kept giving me needles, pricked the tip of my fingers to draw blood, I had an x-ray, and a lot of embarrassing procedures as well. Well, after everything was said and done, the doctors never could found out what was wrong with my stomach. It was a horrible experience, but I had the presence, love, and support of my family there. So did you.
Love,
Damian
Labels: health
Doctors, health, medicine, healthcare, vets
It truly is amazing that we live in a modern industrialized digital world with so many advances in medical research, technology, communication, economics, and science, yet there are cases where physicians still can't diagnose certain physical conditions, second or third opinions vary, and some diagnoses are just flat out wrong. I'm not talking about new or rare diseases, either.
Perhaps one of the most frustrating things occur when one physician pitches taking numerous tests, which even with medical insurance, are many times costly, and still doesn't know what going on. The anger begins to mount when you see another physician who tells you something entirely different. The biggest joke occurs when the 2nd physician just skims or ignores you or your loved ones patient file since he or she is in a rush.
Alas, it truly is the nature of being a living thing- disease and poor health have always existed and always will. I think the MEDIA and Hollywood have created an idealistic image of the capabilities and intelligence of physicians. The physicians create and support that image themselves, as well. In many ways, they are like attorneys-at-law promoting their law firms or politicians campaigning for election. Medicine is truly an inexact science, no what what we hear and read about.
Labels: health, news
