Bow down to the Cockroach
The DailySkew has been conducting an interview with new correspondent Cecil the Cockroach for the last two weeks. Cecil has a few things he wants to discuss about humanity. During the course of our interview (to be published at a later date) two coincidences occurred:
1) Aliens were revealed to be evolved cockroaches from another planet in a Godzilla movie I watched last week.
2) A dying cockroach (big sucker) was on its back in front of the ladies restroom at work Monday morning.
Here is that story.
I saw the brown mass at 10:02 AM Monday morning, and was scared at first, but then saddened because the insect was dead…or so I thought. I saw an antenna move. Then some legs moved. This giant cockroach was probably a German cockroach, as opposed to Florida’s own Palmetto bug.
Now, as Cecil told me, the reason why dead or dying roaches are found on their backs is because their legs haven’t adapted to turn around on flat tiled floors without support. Roaches are just fine in the wild if they fall on their backs, but not on kitchen or bathroom floors. Cecil said it’s pretty embarrassing to die like that…he also said that many roaches on their backs have been poisoned, but I know that we don’t spray for bugs at the office.
I figured the roach was as good as dead…and I also knew that no one was going to pick it up and throw it out. Since it was so big, I had assumed that it lived a long life (probably 4-6 months) and it was just dying of old age.
Come Tuesday morning, I went to examine the carcass, and I was surprised to see the antenna still moving. I went closer, and that’s when the roach communicated to me. It said (by using images):
“Help me! I am still alive! Give me a fighting chance on the outside, not here on the floor in a man made creation. Even if I am to be eaten by a predator…give me a chance to live.”
So, under the cockroach’s control, I got a broom and a dustpan. One co-worker said, “Good, it’s about time someone picked it up”. But I informed her that I was not going to dispose of it..that it has a chance to live. But since I am always afraid to pick them up, I got Danny. He initially refused my first two requests, but under the mind control over the cockroach, I was unrelenting. I gave the items to Danny, and he put the roach in the dust pan. (As soon as the roach got on his feet, he started to run- he was in great condition!)
As Cecil told me during the unpublished interview, one day in the life of a roach is equal to 273 days of a human. So this particular roach had a long, rough day with no food, and was exposed on his back with no hope to get back on his feet- if it wasn’t for me, of course. The mind control was over once the roach was back on his feet.
So Danny took the roach out back. But Danny can’t be trusted because he abused animals when he was a kid in Cuba. And he dropped my new friend at the base of the canal- he wanted to see the fish, bird, or turtle tear my friend to pieces, or perhaps he wanted to see my friend drown after 273+ days of torment on the floor.
Well, guess what?
The cockroach was smarter than Danny.
It swam back on shore, and climbed the concrete curb. He starred at Danny and said, “I will always survive- you can’t beat me!”
Then he ran and hid in the grass, and we parted ways.
Danny claims he wanted to replenish the roach’s energy by dumping him in the water. He lied, of course. An attempted murderer and a liar, and this guy is supposed to be a Christian. (Oh wait, I forgot, the Bible says for Man to rule over all other life forms.)
Compare and contrast my compassion for living things to a former co-worker of mine, let’s call him Don.
One day, a girl, let’s call her Marie, was shouting- “A roach! A roach! Kill it!”
And here comes Don (Enneagram Type 3)- gleefully stepping on it in a LOUD THUD.
There were many reasons why Don did it, none of them noble:
1) To please Marie for a) a chance to have sex and b) political reasons.
2) To support his image of being macho and a protective alpha-male.
3) All other beings (human and non-human) are inferior, thus without value.
Anyway, I felt great that I played a part in saving one life today. I don’t care if people think I’m crazy, weird, or not macho. I really, really don’t care about their opinion when it comes to be saving the lives of creatures. Heck, even Danny felt great about it afterward. It’s not every day that he is outfoxed by a roach!
© TheDailySkew | Bow down to the Cockroach
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saddened by a dead cockroach?
the next step after that is to stop using bathroom cleaner because you feel sorry for the mold that lives on the shower curtain.
feeling sorry for a roach and then trying to save him.
I would have swept it up put it outside and stepped on it, but told you it ran way happy just to make you feel better.
I save my compassion for the mammals.
mammals at least have emotions.
I can even feel sorry for a mouse and on more than one occasion put a sock on my hand a threw the guy outside to be saved from the sadistic slow torture that my cat had in mind for him but this was only after about 10 minutes of waiting for my cat to finish him off while listening to on again off again squeaking.
Admittedly, if he would just gobble the little guy up instead of torturing him i wouldnt stop it.
house cats have the same hunting instincts but are sometimes too well fed to devour their prey.
so there were a couple of times that id scoop up a mouse and throw him outside.
but bugs?
forget it.
“Anyway, I felt great that I played a part in saving one life today”
yeah.
give your self a hand for that.
thanks for saving that roach, so he can die of natural causes about a week from now.
sheesh.
Wow. I had no idea RAW was a conservative at heart.
I think his liberal stance is an act, similar to Michael Savage’s right-wing act.
He’s jealous of the roach.
Give me the Cecil interview~ the world awaits!
By the way, R.A.W…what the f-did you do yesterday? Anything that comes to close saving a roach?
im a victim of
the recession
and you offer
simpathy for something
that doesn’t have
feeling?
u might as well
laugh, cry, or get
angry at a tv show or movie
- i mean, i jst don’t get it
I read that cockroaches do have feelings- especially fear and pain. That’s why they sleep during the day and only come out when you are sleeping, like 3:00AM.
I guess we;ll have to wait for Cicil interview to find out
i think everything here is an april fools prank
dude, i remember you had a box cutter in yoru hand the day “don” stomped on that roach. fuck marie…she should have killed it herself
A lot of guys I know react teh same way as Don and RAW..its liek they rtake a great offense to sweeping bugs outside.i would neve rkill one though.
yo enough criticism of cockroaches…they saved my life on more that one occassion.
The cockroaches at my house get “wild” before any earthquake occurs (I live in Cambodia).
They start running and getting out of their hiding places. … because they can feel some of the very early vibrations of an earthquake- BEFORE it hits- and can be a very good help to give early warnings of earthquake.
Someday, RAW … someday.
What have I done that comes close to saving the life of a defenseless cockroach?
Ill have you know that just the other day I saved some lint that I found in my pocket and put it on a nightable so that it could continue its life cycle and eventually be blown off that table by the air conditioner and roll around on the floor for a few weeks to gather dust and cat hair until it can eventually grow up to be a dust bunny that lives under the couch in the living room.
I feel as if I really did my part yesterday when i chose to save that pocket lint rather than throwing it in the garbage.
but thats just the kind of guy I am.
deep down inside, I know that Ive made the world a better place even though I dont go around advertising it.
Tuco would have ripped that cockroaches guts out and made him curse his own mother for ever having given birth to him.
i found your post after thinking about this roach i saw on its back and wondering does it have feelings, did I do the right thing by leaving it on its back?…. i feel the exact way u wrote this.
Good man, Cesar. Let's turn them back on their stomachs, friend.
Two seconds to save a living being. That’ll really put a dent in your 60 or so year life you have.
Killing a living being just because it exists is not a liable death warrant.
Thanks, Martha. I continue to help and save all kinds of animals, who have the same right to live as humans.