Shark King: 2008 Will be the Year of the Shark Attack
The Shark King Speaketh
DailySkew exclusive
The Shark King (read his first appearance) has claimed responsibility for recent shark attacks in Australia, San Diego, California, and New Smyrna Beach, Florida.
“The war shall always continue,” The Shark King proclaimed from an undisclosed location. “I accept full responsibility.”
“As long as my children are hunted, as long as my babies’ fins are used for soup, my shark network shall destroy humanity. We’ve existed for millions of years before humanity, and will be here after humanity’s extinction.”
The San Diego Beach has reopened: “This shark is probably long, long gone by now, but this is all precautionary,” said Craig Miller, a local marine safety officer.
At New Smyrna Beach, lifeguards continue to clear swimmers: “According to beach records, the latest victim was the ninth recorded shark bite of the year in Volusia County, putting the number of bites ahead of the record breaking Year Of The Shark in 2001.”
On April 8, a 16-year-old surfer was killed by a shark off Australia’s east coast; shark attacks in Australia are rising, according to the University of Florida.
The Shark King mocked humans for using coastlines and deep seas for recreational activities:
“I told these fools to stay out of the waters, yet they continue to walk barefoot in my home. They have swimming pools- use them or be eaten.”
Previous Shark King coverage:
Shark King’s Agent
Devil Ray
Shark King Public Service Announcement
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