Simon Delaghetto, Jr. Used Steroids…as a Kid!
News from the year 2030:
It’s Official Delaghetto, Jr Used Steroids
Tampa Bay Rays MVP shortstop Simon Delaghetto, Jr. admitted that he did in fact use steroids, as revealed by the Brenner Report- as a kid.
When Junior was 5 years old, doctors prescribed steroids to help heal a rare pulmonary and skin disease. Simon was hospitalized for over a week due to his deteriorating condition.
“Yes, I used steroids,” he said in a teary-eyed confession at a press conference.
“This will damage his reputation, that’s for sure,” said FOXNet commentator Mike Lupica, Jr. “Even though he admitted it- so what? Giambi and Pettitte admitted it years ago, and look what happened to them. Are we expected to believe Simon used it ONCE for some RARE and FATAL disease? Please…”
William Montgomery, spokesman for the Hall of Fame said, “I don’t speak for the voters, but based on their lack of elections these past two decades, I’d say Simon Delaghetto, Jr. will be on the outside looking in when he retires.”
Delaghetto has become the second youngest player in the history of baseball to hit 500 homeruns. The first was steroid user Alex Rodriguez, who is not in the Hall of Fame.
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is that really tonies son?
Nope.